The Lovers/Five of Swords. Today I must be very aware of my choices, for the energies of the day will have a dual nature to them, presenting choice after choice. I need to remember that even the smallest moment of neglect can end up having huge ramifications. I also need to remember that I have help; one definition of “duality” is the relationship between me and my gods. And most important of all, I need to remember that a victory attained by unethical means is not a victory at all.

My Thoth card is the Ten of Disks reversed. The “Wealth” card, referring to all kinds of wealth in the physical realms, is considered the Minor Arcana equivalent of The World. It tells us that once we have manifested the correspondence of the suit of Disks, we reach a point where this wealth will either become completely inert under its own weight (and then cease to be wealth and instead will become an anchor, which can be good or bad), or the wealth will transform itself into some higher concept through the infusion of the intellect (and this is accomplished mainly through altruistic means). The card is reversed, so I need to remember that while these potentials are present, I am probably not seeing them, and this could be directly connected to The Lovers and the Five of Swords.

My Legacy card is the Four of Wands reversed. In an upright position, this card tells of the laying of an exciting foundation that offers much potential for enthusiasm and passion through the use of creativity. Because it is reversed, I need to be cautious because I may be acting too quickly, or I may be allowing other more dark influences to tarnish that foundation.

My mostly exclusive focus on the physical realms is finally fading a bit, but before a balance between physical and astral returns, I want to lay the groundwork for a real effort to figure out how I can create a career out of all the knowledge I have collected and skills I have honed over the past nearly seven years that I have been walking on the Path of Wicca. This has been my year of changing focus in many ways, and this is just one of them. I have taken many steps in order to lay a potential foundation that is built from several types of “blocks.” My hope and goal is that a combination of several smaller careers could provide enough funds to allow me to leave my day job.

But, details are important in any magickal working, and so I am creating some lists this week in order to close in on exactly what combination will work for me. Today I will be looking at my current job and deciding which facets are valuable to me personally, and which facets I would rather not have in a permanent career situation.

In an effort to be optimistic, I will first talk about the things I like about my job. The office is close to my house; my commute is exactly 2.1 miles, and if I had to, I could walk to work; I have a reserved parking space. I am also very close to a supermarket, and I am able to go out and get a salad at lunchtime. The building itself is a low rise, and I work on the fifth floor; I have worked in high rise buildings, and I do not like it. The windows in the office face East, which means that in the late Fall, Winter and early Spring, I can watch the full moon rise over the New York Skyline. I can also see down into a small triangle of land that has been left wild because a seasonal stream runs along one side of the triangle.

I work for a small law firm; I was nervous about this when I first started working here because I always worked in offices with more than one assistant. But I have found that I like being on my own most of the time. When things get real busy I miss having someone to help me, but actually that helper ends up answering the phones and working on all the other things that would have to sit idle while I was working on a big project, if that other person was not there. Because I am a perfectionist, I like to have control over any large documents or projects. I used to be a typesetter, so I am anal about formatting, and I am known as a grammar and punctuation nazi as well. I receive fulfillment from knowing that I have done the best I can do to be certain that any project is well taken care of.

What I don’t like about my job is that it takes place in a 9 to 5 environment, which is necessary as the entities with which we interact are all 9 to 5. This means that I must arrive at work at a certain time every day (and of course, that time is too early for my body clock), I must take my lunch at a certain time every day, and whether I have completed my responsibilities or not, I must stay until a certain time every day. There is no way for me to shift the work load and work extra hours for a few days in order to clear a block of time for personal use, there is no way for me to shift or split up the daily block of time that I am working in order to mesh with personal needs.

I can deal with the boredom of administrative assistant/secretarial work, but I don’t like the way it seems to put my brain to sleep. I start out each work week feeling as if my brain is alive and lit up with electrical current; I have a connection to the physical word and I have a connection to the vast universes within me. But as each week day goes by and I sit at my desk for that huge block of time, I need to struggle more and more to wake up my brain. There are not too many ways to make clerical work stimulating to the brain, at least for me, and while I am not afraid to work hard, I would rather be focusing on some form of employment that causes the awake parts of my brain to expand rather than contract.

I like to write, but I want to write about what interests me, rather than working on legal contracts and agreements. I like to create. I like to draw, to create hand made animations the old fashioned way, to dance, and to study occult and metaphysical subjects. I like to learn about the physiology and energy fields of the human body, and the human psyche, and I like to guide and counsel and mentor others who enjoy all of those subjects. I love the Tarot. I am a Reiki Master, and enjoy giving treatments. I enjoy working with rocks and crystals, and I enjoy wire wrapping in order to make jewelry.

Whatever I decide to focus on, I need to be able to maintain this job and gradually segue these other careers into being. I cannot afford to quit my day job, and I cannot afford to go to school.

I am going to print this out, and I am going to read through it every day this week. I am hoping that if I keep shifting the puzzle pieces around, I will finally be able to complete the puzzle and see the image. No, I am not hoping, I am firmly believing that I will do this.

Are there any niches out there that can be filled by a Tarot reader/Reiki practitioner/jewelry maker/energy worker/novelist/artist?

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