Friday, July 30, 2010

The Lovers reversed/Six of Wands. In an upright position, The Lovers (Air, hot/separates and wet/adapts; Gemini, “I think,” social, duality, intelligent; Zayin, double edged sword; and the Path between Tiphareth, the hub of the creation process where energies harmonize and focus to illuminate and clarify, and Binah, female receptive energy and the origin of form and structure) represents the kind of love that brings the creation of new things, but it also represents personal choices, important ones. Since it is reversed, I am being told that today may not be all about me alone. The Six of Wands represents that feeling of satisfaction that happens when you are able to overcome adversity through the implementation of your own skills and ideas. Sounds like although my choices today will not be made through my own preferences, I will feel pretty good nevertheless.

My Thoth card is the Prince of Cups reversed. In an upright position, this Prince is seen by Crowley as being calm on the exterior, but that calm exterior covers up deep and intense feelings. He is seen as open to the ideas of others, but he tends to use them only if they assist in filling his own needs, for he cares about power and wisdom, and his own aims. This is a bit more intense than the usual interpretation of this card, but in any event, the Princes/Knights are mercenaries who focus solely on their own tasks. The card is reversed, though, and I need to beware that I don’t connect with the suit of Cups in an imbalanced manner; too much Water is just as bad as too little Water.

My Legacy card is The Fool, flavored by The Star reversed. The Fool is another Air card, and it also corresponds with Uranus (technology, science, radical change), Aleph (the head, youthful learning) and the Path between Chokmah (male in the electric sense, dynamic energy and the origin of vital force and polarity) and Kether (the source; limitless possibility). It represents being at the helm of a powerful vehicle, maybe more powerful than realized, and while the ending may be fantabulous, that nature of ending will be in part due to luck, and in part due to skill and courage. The Star (more Air; Aquarius, “I know,” the group, friendships; Tsadi, fish hook, experience or thought; and the Path between Yesod and Netzach) in an upright position tells of the new hope that comes the morning after a monstrous storm. Because the card is reversed, I am being warned that a potential imbalance exists.

My 6-digit date number is 11 (Archangel Uriel), which reduces to 2, the number of balance and distance/line.

My horoscopes: “Get things out in the open today, Sagittarius. If someone seems to insult you, call them on it. Letting things fester inside only destroys your self-esteem. You'd also be in danger of losing the respect of others. This could very well be a situation in which everyone but you sees the truth. Try not to let this happen. Be bold and assertive, and don't let others pull the wool over your eyes.”

And: “You took your role as class clown quite seriously (still do, really), and you've always made sure to keep up your skills. Anyone who wants to wrestle the title away from you finds it next to impossible, in fact. You're able to defend it today, no matter where you find yourself. Make sure you can turn it off, if and when the situation turns serious -- in a romantic way, that is.”

And: “Someone whom you'd rather not see might visit you at your home today. This could be a friend of a housemate, or an ex-lover, or an obnoxious salesman who won't leave. It might be best for you to make your excuses and leave yourself, as this may be the only way to shake this person loose from your doorstep. Don't worry about being polite. Life is too short to sacrifice your own peace for an uninvited guest.”

Finally Friday! My in-laws and their dog are coming down to Cape May this weekend, and I am really looking forward to this. We will got to Higbee Beach and explore the tidal pools and streams, we will have some great meals and listen to some great music, and I will do some bodywork. How cool is that??!!

I touched base with one of my Guides, The General. He smiled, and told me that yes, he is still around, but as of now he is not needed. He acknowledged that he still watches me and is always ready to guide me should that guidance be needed, but he also explained that I am at the stage where any growth needs to happen by my Will and influence, and not tainted by his. The General reminded me that I have been in this position too, and after offering guidance and suggestions, I have stood back and watched as my own student tries out his or her new skills. I still feel responsibility for that student because he or she is using my knowledge and advice to make his or her decisions, but I do not want to taint what they are becoming on their own by tampering with the process. I understand this completely, and I am reassured that The General is still there, should I need him.

I seem to be experiencing a new flow of energy, and this new flow seems to have begun yesterday, as I accepted the fact that the Rubedo is winding down and I need to start preparing for the next cycle. I actually feel empowered by this new energy; it feels kind of similar to that time when the tide has completed its ebb flow and its pause, and now the waters are beginning to return. **smile** I am riding a tidal bore! However, according to my divination for the day, I should not let exuberance blind me to any dangers.

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Thursday, July 29, 2010

Knight of Swords/Page of Cups reversed. The Knights of the Court Cards are the hired mercenaries who are able to put their own needs aside in order to accomplish a specific task. The Knight of Swords focuses on goals regarding communication and intellectual and intuitive processes, and I am being told that these are the things that I can best affect today. The Page of Cups in an upright position is about manifesting creative projects, usually in idealized form or regarding the pleasing of the senses or a feeling of satisfaction. As this Page is reversed, satisfaction will not be something I will find today, unless that satisfaction comes from being able to focus intensely on the intellect and logic, and the imposition of logic onto and into the challenges and tasks of the day.

My Thoth card is the Two of Cups reversed. “The Lord of Love,” but the love and happiness associated with this card are being blocked from me. That does not mean they are not there waiting to be accessed, for the card has appeared; but it is up to me to take the next step and strive to connect.

My Legacy card is the Ten of Swords reversed, flavored by the Page of Wands. The Ten of Swords in an upright position illustrates what happens when we manifest the energies of the suit exclusively; those who do not accept the message of the Ace of Swords and its suggestion to use intellectual challenges in order to grow and to integrate the other suits into solutions, will be impaled by that Sword. Because the card is reversed, I may be able to deflect the end result, or I will be able to learn valuable lessons from it. The Page of Wands uses assertion and action in order to feed his need for adventure and excitement. He has a childlike optimism, and since the suit of Wands is associated with Fire and the Will, he can often manifest that optimism into reality, mainly because in his childlike enthusiasm he refuses to see failure. Together, these cards are telling me that I have a truly powerful opportunity to learn and grow before me, and I need to not only view this opportunity as an exciting adventure, but I need to also believe that the results will be well worth the effort.

My 6-digit date number is 10, the number of completion of a cycle, which reduces to the number 1, the number of position and new beginnings.

My horoscopes: “Today is a very powerful day for you, Sagittarius. You may find yourself going to extremes in certain areas of your life, especially when it comes to your romantic nature. You could be pulled way over to one side and then to the other. At first you may give it your all and the next minute completely withdraw. Try to find a balance in this seesaw game.”

And: “You're not afraid of hard work, but you've been doing far more than your fair share lately, and you seriously need some time off. Let yourself go! You can be extravagant when it comes to down time -- or anything else that perks you up. All your self-discipline is good for your soul, but not all that great for your love life. Walk away from it all and get out there.”

And: “You may be especially sensitive to the moods of others, and today they could be a bit testy. It could be hard to get much accomplished with all the yelling and screaming that's going on. This is definitely not an environment conducive to deep thinking. Do your best to stay completely out of the fray and focus on what you need to do. The yelling is likely to subside by the end of the day.”

“Summertime, and the living is easy . . .”; well, the living is slow and hot and sweaty, akshully. Since the “dog days” began in June this year, my brain has been foggy for weeks now. Add to the heat fog that is slowing down my thinking processes the Rubedo stage and its focus on integrating new acquisitions rather than striving to attain them, and I am experiencing with new awareness the transition from the peak of the waxing year (equal to the vertical and horizontal balance of the number 6; sorry, but I always think in Tarot analogies *grin*) to the first harvest and the beginning of the waning year (equal to the pause and beginning of degeneration that is the number 7).

Yes, there is a difference between the putrefaction of the transition from the Albedo to the Rubedo and the stagnation that is the transition from waxing energies to waning energies. Since my awareness of the effects of growth and evolution is more intense within this cycle, I am able to see details that have not been visible to me in the past.

The putrefaction of the Great Work seems to have happened as I reached my maximum capacity to download and process information. There would be a natural slowdown as that maximum capacity came close, which would give inertia an easier time to grab hold of the process and slow it down even further. this slowdown as maximum capacity nears is a necessary safety feature for it prevents overflow and the resulting loss of potentially important data. My putrefaction happened at the transition from receiving the download to processing the download, or LOL, installing the program, and computer downloads are a good metaphor for this process. Once the files had been extracted and moved into my mind, I needed to activate the installation process, and that activation can only be done if I can overcome the inertia that caused the necessary slowdown of the download. I needed to choose to begin processing the information and to do that, I needed to overcome the putrefaction of the safety slowdown.

At this point in the Wheel of the Year, when the Summer Solstice and it’s peak of active and outer energies is now progressing towards the first harvest of Lammas and the beginning of movement toward the dark, outer quiet and inner focus of Winter, I am also dealing with the ending of the Rubedo and its focus on the integration of what has been accumulated thus far. During this time of integration, the part of my mind that is open to receiving new information has been quiet as it was gradually emptied by the processing and integration of the Rubedo; now this part of me only contains the dregs of all that information and there is very little movement. Stagnation has begun, just the very beginning of stagnation, but stagnation just the same. I had accumulated quite a lot of new knowledge and wisdom that needed to be integrated, but now I am beginning to miss the accumulation process as the integration process begins to wind down and accumulate its own inertia. Like that first cool and dry breeze that cuts through the heat and humidity and gives us a new burst of energy, I am feeling the first need to reconnect with that accumulating phase of the Great Work. In order to do that, I need to go back to the very beginning of the entire cycle, and begin again. I hesitate to say that I need to start over, for that is not a truly accurate description. Yes, I will be going through the entire cycle of the Great Work again, from the beginning, but I will be doing it at a different level because I have within me the knowledge and wisdom and resulting skills from the last cycle, and I will make use of them as I move forward.

I love this stuff!!

On another note, I did three massages this weekend, and received one. Helen and I are really happy with our sequence; it is working well and we are ready to fly. This week we will work on our website and on getting PayPal and credit card information.

I also have been feeling the presence of Miss Pauline again. It had been so long that I was beginning to think that she had left us, but once again she is joining me in the wee hours of the morning. I am usually awakened by either the sound of hammering or knocking coming from downstairs, or the feeling of the bed being shaken. Then, if I have covers on, I fell the now-familiar sensation of having the covers pulled from my body. This last weekend, something different happened: since it was hot, the light blanket I had was laying next to me and after she woke me, Miss Pauline dropped one corner of the blanket onto my shoulder! These events aren’t happening every weekend yet, and I am hoping that they will continue.

The Pagan Brain Trust will be meeting this Monday night; I am really looking forward to getting together with them because things have been happening, to all of us, and I love the way we all process each others’ informational downloads. I will be bringing my matt, of course.

Mystery received her Reiki III attunement last night from Lady Raven. The cool thing is that I actually woke up during her attunement (at about 1:10 am this morning), and my palms were tingling in a similar but less intense fashion as they tingled during my own three attunements! She and I have certainly achieved a strong energy body connection through our workings! This morning, she told me that she could clearly feel my presence during the whole attunement process, validating my own experience.

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Thursday, July 22, 2010

The Moon/Four of Swords reversed. The Moon (Water, cold/binds and wet/adapts; Pisces, “I believe,” feeling, soul growth, duality, spirituality; Qof, back of head; and the Path between Malkuth, the physical world of action and physical, outer reality, and Netzach, the stimulating factors of emotion and inspiration) is about imagination and illusion, enchantment and magick. I am being told that these effects are important for me today, and my own feminine intuition may have some important messages. The Four of Swords in an upright position tells of a time of respite and recovery, but since it is reversed, I may not find that a pause will be beneficial to me today.

My Thoth card is the Nine of Cups. The “Happiness” card, and this happiness, according to Uncle Al, is appearing because today I believe in my own good luck. I may feel emotionally satisfied today, but I need to remember that attaining that result is also taking the first step toward stagnation, so I should limit the time I allow myself to wallow in satisfaction.

My Legacy card is The Magician reversed, flavored by the Six of Wands reversed. In an upright position, The Magician (Air, hot/separates and wet/adapts; Mercury, reason, intelligence, skill; Beth, house, builder; and the Path between Binah, female, receptive energy and the origin of form and structure, and Kether, the source and limitless possibility) in an upright position tells of the skills and natural abilities that allow me to not only be a bridge or conduit between the energies of the spiritual realms and the physical world, but also abilities that allow me to use everything that the spiritual and physical worlds have to offer to further my own goals. Since the card is reversed, and flavored by the Six of Wands reversed (which in an upright position represents that sense of victory that comes when you overcome challenges), to day will certainly not be a day of being able to easily manifest results through the use of the tools and skills that are available to me.

My 6-digit date number is 3, the number of new manifestation.

My horoscopes: “In general, your spirit is upbeat, freedom loving, and adventurous, Sagittarius. Today, however, you might find that it's a bit more intense and possibly somber, especially when it comes to romantic issues. This approach to matters of the heart isn't exactly your normal style, but you're apt to find that it's appropriate for your situation now. Make sure you have the right tools for the job at hand.”

And: “You may feel like you've got your territory marked, whether on the job, at home, or even in your love life -- but the stakes are easily pulled up right now. You need to expand your domain, as soon as possible, because someone new may be eying your turf. Insist that all plans be laid out for everyone to see, and then show why you deserve what you've got -- and then some.”

And: “The key for you today is follow-through. You may have one hundred different projects lying around your house and not one of them is finished. Perhaps you are too busy going off on adventures to really settle down and commit to something for an extended period of time. This sort of attitude is apt to be a reflection of emotional issues you are dealing with as well. Attend to unfinished business.”

Everything in my divination efforts for the day seems to indicate that while I am creating and strengthening my ties between my Intentions and my Will, and the manifestations I need and want to happen in the physical world, I need to be alert and vigilant in order to prevent the putrefaction of the Rubedo. Does it ever go away? No, I have learned that it does not. The three laws of thermodynamics apply here. They are:

First law: Energy likes to be conserved; therefore it cannot be created or destroyed, merely transformed.

Second law: Entropy (a measure of information) tends to increase. This means that the longer a system exists, the more disorder or unavailable information it contains.

Third law: As temperature approaches absolute zero, the entropy or chaos becomes more constant.

From “The Subtle Body: An Encyclopedia of Your Energetic Anatomy” by Cyndi Dale.

What does that mean? Well, to me, those three laws are telling me that energy tends to conserve itself rather than voluntarily expending itself. This means that in order to overcome inertia, and in order to keep the energy in motion, any manifestation that I wish to initiate and maintain needs constant tending if it is not to grind to a halt under its own weight. Yes, Intention is important, visualizing my goals is important, too; but if I don’t regularly inject a portion of my own Will into the whole process, my goal will run out of gas.

So, I think I will set a small goal for myself starting right now: I need to do one thing, even if it is something tiny, each day, towards achieving my goal of becoming a full-time Vedic Thai-Yoga Bodywork Massage Therapist. Each night when I go to bed, I want to be able to say that I did something, even something small, towards making that happen. I will try to journal my results each day, because just like memorializing my new goal in my journal, writing the results adds reality and power to them.

As I came to the end of my walk last night, Danu suddenly came to me and filled me with Her unique love. I felt Her arms around me, and She whispered: “My daughter, you are loved, deeply. I have claimed you for My own, and I will always present to you only those events and effects that are for your highest good, even if you do not perceive them that way. Please remember that you are Mine, and I always care for those that belong to Me. Do not allow yourself to be distracted from that sure knowledge by life’s events, for I am always there behind you, with My hands on your shoulders as I support and nurture you, and encourage you to have the courage to take each next step.” Oh, I love when Danu does that.

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Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Knight of Pentacles reversed/Five of Swords reversed. In an upright position, the Knight of Pentacles is about a focus on resource allocation, understanding cause and effect and achieving tangible results. Those things are not easily accessed today, but the card is there, so those focuses are present as well. The Five of Swords in an upright position represents the imposition of Will and mental focus in order to achieve wants, needs or desires, to the point of possibly crossing the line between ethical and unethical behavior; because the card is reversed, I will most likely be able to stay away from that dividing line today by not focusing on imposing my Will upon a situation. Today will not be a day of resolution, but since the energies are there, although they are blocked, I may be able to identify the issue.

My Thoth card is The Empress reversed. Whoa, Major Arcana cards two days in a row, ant this one supports The Hermit of yesterday. The Empress in an upright position corresponds with Earth (cold/binds and dry/shapes), Venus (beauty, pleasure, eroticism), Daleth (door or womb), and the Path between Tiphareth (the hub of the creation process where energies harmonize and focus to illuminate and clarify) and Kether (the source, limitless possibility); she is about the senses and the enjoyment of the physical world through the senses, and about the creation that happens as a manifestation of that enjoyment. Because she is reversed, she is telling me to look within myself to understand those effects rather than looking outward at the catalyst of those effects: the physical world. She is also reminding me that I cannot allow myself to become drunk on those pleasures, for while her motto of life according to Uncle Al is “love and let love; rejoice in every shape of love, and get thy rapture and thy nourishment thereof,” she is reversed today, and thus the imbalance of the manifesting of this motto, either through too much or too little of its energy, is a focus for the day.

My Legacy card is the Three of Cups, flavored by the Page of Wands reversed. The Three of Cups is about emotional connections, emotional abundance, and the ability to enjoy and share those bounties. The Page of Wands in an upright position is about attraction, excitement, optimism, and about getting results through assertion and action; since the Page is reversed, I am being told that assertion and action will not be easily accessed today in order to enjoy and share my emotional bounties.

My 6-digit date number is 11 (Archangel Uriel, and by association, challenging and possibly uncomfortable realizations), which reduces to 2, the number of Balance and distance.

My horoscopes: “Your sensual side is likely to show itself today, Sagittarius. You might find yourself viewing young folks in tight jeans more appreciatively than you usually do. Racy novels and movies might also suddenly seem appealing. Romantic encounters are intense and passionate, so make sure you allow plenty of time for them. Enjoy yourself!”

And: “There's never been a time when you haven't been at least thinking about travel. It could be that you just saw 'Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon' and now you need to see the Chinese wilderness, or maybe you caught a glimpse of the Eiffel Tower in an old classic movie. You need to wait a bit before you make any plans -- as long as you want it to go well!”

And: “It could be that you have been riding a high wave lately, and that things have been naturally going your way for the last few months. Long-term trends are definitely in your favor. You may find that today, however, there is some sort of practical, grounded force which is reminding you that you, too, are mortal, and that you need to touch ground once in a while to reconnect with the details of your plans.”

Lots of reversed cards today. Interesting that the only card not reversed is the Three of Cups. Water is the active flow, while Fire, Air and Earth are passive.

Yesterday, I was warned by my Patroness, Danu, that something powerful and beneficial would cross my path yesterday; this warning to be alert was supported by my Guide, Ailm, when she and I connected as always, during my morning meditation/chakra balance/Reiki application. I remembered this alert/warning all day, and kept my eyes open, but it was not until last night that I realized exactly what “next step up the ladder of enlightenment” had been presented to me. That next step came to me through the catalyst of an email from Mystery last night regarding the need for both of us to find some mutually acceptable manifestation in the physical world of the unique, so far non-physical connection that we share through our magickal partnership.

Mystery was right to bring this up at this time. As predicted by our Guides and our Deities, our collaborations are bringing both of us into uncharted waters, and we need to attempt to understand the power of our partnership, and find a way to manifest that power for ourselves and each other. I thought about this all last night, trying to come up with an answer, and I really sense that we are on the verge of some big realization (although I can't get any clue as to what it is). In my usual meticulous fashion, the first thing I needed to do was define exactly our ingredients, at least from my perspective. Something connected with us, way back when I was responding to Mystery’s First Degree homeworks. Because she has the memories of the past lives in which we connected, she recognized right away exactly what that initial recognition of each other consisted of. I still don't have most of those memories, but I have come to believe that I am not supposed to have them. One of us is not to have those clear and detailed memories for an important reason.

So, here is what I crystallized through my winding thought process. Knowing Mystery and interacting with her, even early on when our interactions were solely through emails regarding homeworks, has been a major ingredient in my deepening my connection to my personal energy field, and thus, to all of my senses. LOL, from her perspective, this is more of a re-awakening for me of something that has been dormant thus far in this lifetime, rather than a new discovery. This deepening/re-awakening has happened not because of the similar focuses that we share, but rather because of the different focuses (and different memories) that we don't share, and our efforts to reconcile those differences in a way that does not cause harm to either of us.

What do I mean by this? Within the energy patterns that are similar, there is no resistance. Those are the peaceful and healing energy flows, and they are good. LOL, you need pleasure of some kind to be able to activate the Law of Opposites and thus, begin to understand the “discomfort” (but not bad discomfort) that happens within the resistance that occurs when two differing or opposing energy flows come together. Where and what are our major differences? They lie within memories (the detailed memories that Mystery has of our past alliances, of which I only have a few) and sensations (the way each of our brains interpret certain sensations and our responses to those sensations as sexual or sensual).

Therein lies the issue, the conflict, or the potential blockage. Now, I don’t necessarily see issues, conflicts or blockages as a bad thing. In some circumstances they are bad, but in other circumstances they serve to test the connection and thus, to make it stronger. To me, that is one result we will experience as we search for a method of manifestation and fulfillment that is acceptable to us both.

LOL, so where am I heading with this? As soon as I started to set my energy field up for my Tarot throws of the day, once again I instantly felt Danu, but this time I also got a huge wave of Mystery’s energy. In typical Mystery fashion, it roared over me like a wave, awakening every cell in my body and every electron in my energy field. I was given an opportunity to really “see” and begin to categorize my brain’s understanding of our combined energy fields.

I felt my own energy and aura mixed with hers as a syrupy, soft and silky flow; I have felt this energy before within our dedication ritual and our other workings but this time it was strong. Every one of my senses experienced this energy: my third eye saw it as a silvery flow filled with gold sparkles; my ears heard it as it flowed and eddied, the way a wave sounds as it flows over a thick patch of pebbles; I could smell it, the way a rainstorm smells on a particularly dry and low humidity day; I could feel it, the way water feels like silk on the skin when you skinny dip at night. Every one of my chakras opened, and there was a two-way flow into and out of my Core Value Anchor. Deep within me, my Hara Point became heavy, and leaned against my womb.

Aha!! There it was!! That not-quite-sexual-pleasure-but-very-much-sensual-pleasure, that very-hard-to-categorize-effect, of the pooling and ponding of a large amount of personal energy!! I am feeling this as intense sensuality because all of my senses are involved in experiencing the effects of the energy flow, and I am feeling this as “almost sexual” energy because my Core Value Anchor and my Hara Point are leaning on my womb. Because I have done a great deal of research about and work with my energy field as I researched Sacred Movement and Thai Massage, and because my Patron has directed me to intensify this energy work over the past seven months to prepare for and increase my manifestation of my dedication to Him, I am not categorizing this energy “weight” on my womb as sexual, but as “almost sexual” (and that term makes perfect sense to me, but may not make sense to anyone else).

So, now that I better understand what is happening inside of me (and thus, what is happening inside of Mystery), the next step is to (*crosses fingers*) deal with our dilemma. In this lifetime, we are both heterosexual women, both married to men who are able to please us. Sex and sensual pleasures are both a large part of our lives (both our physical lives and our magickal lives, for both of us practice sex magick), but neither one of us is interested in sex with another woman. The intensity of our energy connection (which began intense, and has grown and continues to grow through our workings and through the preparations of those workings) brings a mental response, an emotional response and a spiritual response within our physical bodies somewhere within the almost sexual -- intensely sexual range. We both feel the need to manifest and memorialize all this energy; and since we both are feeling the need to meet face to face, we will most certainly experience some heavy stuff when that day comes.

I believe that we will not find a final solution until we meet in the physical world, or at least we won’t be able to test any possible solution with 100% certainty until then. But I will say this much: that moment is going to pack a wallop. If just setting the intention in my mind of finding some way to physically manifest this energy has brought this incredible increase in the connection between us (kind of like experiencing a Reiki attunement), meeting in person is going to be a memorable experience. Once again, more than either of us can anticipate, and we have been told this will continue to happen by our own Patrons and Patronesses.

I am believing that the solution will come to us through a collaboration of efforts (which has worked in the past for us). That is why I am documenting my thoughts with such detail. I may have to do a little research, and coincidentally (or maybe not coincidentally), last night I purchased an awesome book, “The Subtle Body: An Encyclopedia of Your Energetic Anatomy” by Cyndi Dale, which will be my first research source. LOL, I have a few other ideas, too, as far as potential sources of information.

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Thursday, July 15, 2010

Ten of Wands/Two of Pentacles. The suit of Wands starts with incredibly potent Fire energy, but it ends with a total burnout. I need to be aware that I might be spinning my wheels today, and this is a waste of energy and effort. However, while my creative processes may be stalled, in the physical realms I am able to balance activity and inactivity in a beneficial way. This Two could very well indicate the balancing act that I am performing between my day job, which is winding down, and my new focus, which is Vedic Thai-Yoga Massage. The message of these cards together is that I need to achieve balance at the edge of the chaos that is change, without becoming ineffective.

My Thoth card is the Five of Cups reversed. “Disappointment” caused by stirring of the waters, in an upright position. Because the card is reversed, I won’t be distracted by any unpleasant results from the stirring up of emotions, and I will instead be able to find a benefit even in an uncomfortable situation.

My Legacy card is the Two of Cups, flavored by the Seven of Coins reversed. The Two of Cups is about recognizing the value of love, and of our relationships that are based on and fed by love. The Seven of Coins in an upright position tells of a time when a choice must be made: either I determine that I have enough and don’t need to try any more, or I determine that I need more and must keep striving. Either choice has risks, for settling may mean missing an opportunity and continued striving may mean losing it all. Because the card is reversed, I am being told that there is a possibility that I won’t need to make certain choices in the physical realms, or I should refrain from making those choices, in order to not damage my relationships. I must be cautious that I don’t see the glass as half empty.

My 6-digit date number is 5, the number of motion imposed onto stability in order to prevent stagnation.

My horoscopes: “Suddenly you've found your energy again. Your engine is oiled up and ready to go, Sagittarius. Put yourself in high gear and don't let anything stand in your way. If disagreements with others arise, try to keep focused on the lessons that come from the situation instead of dwelling on the negative aspects. Take things to a higher level and don't be afraid to suggest radical change.”

And: “You have been caught up in a social whirlwind lately, and today you are happy to stay home by yourself and unwind. You might want to get out pen and paper and record some of the incidents of the past few days. It could be that you've gained new insight or understanding into a particular problem. Some quiet time spent analyzing the situation could yield some interesting solutions.”

And: “Someone close insists on sorting out all the little details and then scooting them out of the way, but you know it's silly to focus on them right now, as so much about the bigger picture remains unknown. Rather than just arguing over what's important, try to retreat a few steps and work on the parts each of you consider most important. Check in with each other often, and things should go more smoothly for both of you.”

I had decided last week to reconnect with my Guides, and over the weekend I reached out to Ailm. She was happy to see me, and when I apologized for not spending time with her, she assured me that she knew about the different challenges that had been facing me. We sat together for a while; I talked about my own issues, and then she updated me on her group. She told me there were several young men from Bear’s village who had made more than one journey from the Winter homestead in the mountains to the Summer place at the ocean; these young men had decided that this year they would focus on erecting a few permanent structures. They have decided to stay behind when the group leaves for the mountains in the Fall, and attempt to spend the Winter at the ocean. If they are successful, they are hoping to increase the size of the compound and then entice others to stay.

As we spoke, Ailm’s “heir apparent,” Jol-el, who is now about four years old, came over. Ailm formally introduced me to Jol-el (who bowed formally to me), explaining that I am her Higher Self, and she is my Higher Self, and told Jol-el how pleased she was that she and I had connected. She explained that connecting with your Higher Self has many benefits, for the Higher Self will always offer knowledge and wisdom, but that it is a two-way relationship. Sometimes it is the Higher Self who is in need, and responding to the request for aid is as important as being able to ask for help yourself. Jol-el asked Ailm when he would meet his Higher Self, and she told him that she could not answer that question; when the time was right, he would meet his Higher Self.

We all sat together for a while, reconnecting. Since then, I reach out to Ailm each morning and she joins me for my meditation.

The Pagan Brain Trust got together this past Monday night. We talked about our Reiki Share of the previous evening, we shared our personal toils and triumphs, and I gave Elizabeth, who is a Reiki Teacher, a Thai Massage. We are all missing our magickal/metaphysical/spiritual efforts, and plan on moving back in that direction at our next meeing.

I am very much focusing on the Rubedo and on making use of my new skills in order to “own” them. I am ready to begin manifesting my goals, and each tiny step is a miracle to me because those steps are taking me in a new direction, my own chosen direction. And I am finding that the best tool to combat the fog of putrefaction is action, taking even just one tiny step. Taking action seems to dissipate the fog!

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Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Nine of Pentacles/Eight of Pentacles. Lots of Earth (cold/binds and dry/shapes) today; both of these cards focus on my physical world. The Eight of Pentacles is reminding me that I have work to do, and I need to be focused and dedicated in order to achieve my goals. But the work is worth it, even if the payoff itself seems to be not in sight. I am also being told that I need to balance theory with practical experience; I can’t neglect the “doing” in the name of “learning.” In the end, I have great potential to bring balance and strength and success into a combination of the spiritual world and the physical realms!

My Thoth card is the Five of Swords. “Defeat,” but not in the usual manner. The suit of Swords is about the element of Air, and the intellect; the serenity and truce of the number 4 has ended because it could no longer be maintained. I need to remember that while sometimes it is necessary to end a truce in order to achieve resolution, I cannot be selfish and unethical in the process. Everything can’t always be my way.

My Legacy card is the Ace of Coins flavored by The Sun reversed. The Ace of Coins tells me that an opportunity has presented itself but that opportunity has not yet begun to manifest. I am the final ingredient that will begin the process, and until I truly commit myself, the opportunity will remain theory instead of reality. Now is the time to begin, for even though The Sun is reversed, it is there and so is its potential. In an upright position, The Sun (Fire, hot/separates and dry/shapes; the sun, the inner core of a person or situation, influential power; Resh, face, reason; the Path between Yesod, the stimulating factors of emotion and inspiration, and Hod, analysis and communication), and like the opportunity in the physical realms, the energies of The Sun are not engaged in the situation, or are being blocked from engaging, but because I know they are there, those energies could be accessed.

My 6-digit date number is 4, the number of stability (and increasing stagnation).

My horoscopes: “A good tactic for you today would be to convert your fears into motivation for positive action. There's a great deal of energy at your disposal, Sagittarius, so don't waste it. Be aware that this is one of those times in which the smallest comment or insult could set off a huge chain reaction of misinformation or battles. People are quite emotionally charged, so be careful where you step.”

And: “Prove yourself worthy today by standing up for exactly what it is that you believe in. You will find that there is a tremendous amount of power and strength at your disposal. Transform negative feelings into cannon balls of transforming energy. You can make anything happen today as long as you set your mind to it. There is nothing stopping you from getting you to where you need to go.

And: “If it feels like professional pressure is mounting, you need to turn your attention to getting the job done. That proves that you mean what you say, and also that you have the chops to back it up. Keep your eyes open and focused, and avoid all distractions (including all the drama your colleagues are dreaming up right now). You know exactly what's necessary.”

I have been reviewing the stages of The Great Work, and I have realized an interesting indication that the Rubedo is upon me. The third step of The Great Work is called the Red Phase. The Rubedo is the logical next step, the step that allows the release and manifestation of the energies that were completely transformed by the Nigredo and the Albedo. Interestingly enough, there is a sort of “mini-Dark Night” within the processes of the Rubedo, just before the final result, usually called “putrefaction.” This step provides a last chance to remove any remaining contaminants or remainder of ego.

This “putrefaction” has appeared! I am feeling as if I am in limbo, with everything ready to go but no action being taken and no results being manifested. This pause, I have come to realize, is my indication that I am the last ingredient, that the tipping point toward manifestation of the new and transformed energies is attained when I commit myself to acting and when I take those first actions. Until then, everything is paused, ready and willing but unable to begin until I add my own energies, my own intentions, my own Will. Those are the ingredients that become the “big bang,” they are the fire that ignites all the fuel I have so carefully gathered and arranged for optimum effect. I am the necessary “on/off switch,” and until I commit myself to the endeavor, it will pause, and eventually begin to stagnate.

Cool!!!

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Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Four of Cups/Nine of Swords. The Four of Cups is about the stagnation that can occur when our senses are sated, and about being distracted by the desire for even more pleasure without appreciating what is already there. The Nine of Swords represents the intellect run wild, and tells me that I am most likely worrying about something that does not deserve quite so much attention.

My Thoth card is the Ten of Swords reversed. The “Ruin” card, reversed (whew!). In an upright position, this card warns that if we become so narrowly focused on the actual fighting of the battle, we may loose the war without realizing it. Because the card is reversed, I am being told that the end has not come yet, so I can still save the day if I allow myself to broaden my views and make use of more than just intellect to achieve victory.

My Legacy card is the Two of Cups reversed, flavored by the Four of Cups. Marchetti describes the energy of the Two of Cups as similar to seeing the reflection of yourself in your lover’s eyes. This is a card of recognition, recognition of an important relationship, and recognition of the fact that the connection is so strong, a part of myself is now in my lover. Today I may be able to benefit from the support of those who love me, and in turn offer my own support. I do need to remind myself, however, that sitting back and allowing myself to become intoxicated by love to the point where I can’t function is not a good thing.

My 6-digit date number is 3 the number of new creations and manifestations, and the ability to determine location.

My horoscopes: “Group events taking place at churches, meditation centers, and other places with a spiritual orientation could draw you near, Sagittarius. You might want to attend a service or program at one of them. Don't be surprised if some profound insights come to you that shed some light on a current situation you might be dealing with. Write them down or you might forget them later.”

And: “Adventure is calling, and you always answer in the affirmative. You've got the itch to get out of the house, so if you can, take a little road trip today -- even just to a new neighborhood, or maybe even a simple, tasty meal from a new-to-you culture can be enough to satisfy your wanderlust. If you've got time, start researching that trip abroad you've been meaning to take.”

Air and Water today in my Tarot cards. Air is about problems or challenges, and rises actively; Water is about staying the same, and contracts and falls. What these two elements have in common is that they are both blends, and subject to mixing. This means that I could end up with a bit of Balance, and even though these elements are mostly opposites, because they can mix, the interactions can be beneficial.

Since the Four of Cups showed up twice today, I thought I would give it a bit of additional attention. In Crowley’s Naples Arrangement, the number 4 is about stability and solidness. These energies are well grounded and not easily deformed; they are what they are and they aren’t going anywhere or making changes any time soon. Pair these energies with the element of Water, which is about feelings and emotions and flowing, and you get a still pool of water: a perfect breeding ground for stagnation. The thing about this kind of stagnation is that it tends to sneak up on you. Here we are, sitting there feeling good about ourselves, and while we aren’t watching, inertia begins to tie us down, bit by bit. As we sit and contemplate, we start visualizing the pleasures that are yet to come, until we become totally focused on those visions, and life passes us by. This is the danger of the Four of Cups.

We need challenges in order to be strong and vibrant and healthy. If we never know fear, we also never know if we have true courage. If we sit on the couch and watch tv without moving, our muscles will atrophy. If we don’t use our minds and our imaginations, they will atrophy as well. Taking a mini-vacation or allowing a bit of time to be a slug or to daydream is not a bad thing; these occupations are only bad or harmful if taken to extremes or if promoted in an imbalanced manner.

So how do I counter this imbalance? Out of five cards thrown, I have three cards that describe the suit of Cups and the influence of the element of Water, and two cards that describe the suit of Swords and the influence of the element of Air. The only reversed card is the Ten of Swords, a card that further focuses on the gradual ebbing of motion because of the lack of fuel. I need to balance my day out with a bit of focus on something that feeds my passions, my enthusiasm, and my intention to transform, and a bit of awareness of the presence of these Fiery sensations and feelings. I can do this effectively by getting up and moving around, and focusing on my personal energy field. I am heading to the ladies room, to do some stretches. I will go out at lunchtime, and I will stretch in the afternoon, too. Then, I have a belly dance class tonight; a perfect ending to a day which needs some “get-up-and-go”!!

Last night I did my third bodywork session in as many days. I have a dance class tonight, so I won't be able to do one today, but tomorrow I will do another. Practice!!

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Monday, July 12, 2010

The High Priestess/Seven of Swords reversed. The High Priestess (Water, cold/binds and wet/adapts; the Moon, feelings, emotions, imagination; Beth, house, builder; and the Path between Tiphareth, the hub of the creation process which harmonizes and focuses energies in order to illuminate and clarify, and Kether, the source, limitless possibility) is the manifestation of the unconscious and the effects of the mysterious in our everyday world. The Seven of Swords in an upright position tells of the attempt to maintain a current situation beyond its lifespan using extreme or unethical methods. Because it is reversed, the Seven of Swords seems to be validating the acceptance of mystery, the unexplained and the unknown that is The High Priestess. She is able to maintain a separation between opposites yet still keep them both balanced, without trying to control using extreme methods.

My Thoth card is the Two of Swords reversed. The upright meaning to this card is “Peace,” although the image on the card does not look peaceful; rather it resembles a pile of jagged broken glass. The peace presented in Crowley’s Two of Swords is not harmonious, but rather a peace that is maintained by vigilance. This peace is more of a stalemate than a serenity, and it hints that there could very well be some sneaky stuff going on behind the scenes that is missed, possibly due to a refusal to really see things as they are. The card is reversed, so the energies are not effective, but the card is there. Vigilance is still needed.

My Legacy card is the Five of Swords reversed, flavored by the Ace of Coins reversed. The upright Five of Swords tells of a victory, but the victory is usually a hollow one. Perhaps this is because the methods of attaining the victory ended up presenting a higher cost than expected, or perhaps the victory is worthless because the end result is not as expected. The Ace of Coins is the source of resources and the supplier of form, but neither one has yet manifested and only exists as potential. Whatever my mind tells me is attained today will at the very least be ethically attempted, if not ending up a bit better than expected. Despite this, I may find that the end result is not tapping into and assisting to attain the physical world goals that have been much on my mind. But all is not lost for that physical world potential is there; I am just not connecting to it. I need to remember that also present is the tendency to achieve what I want through a bull-in-the-china-closet method, and that is not what makes me feel good about myself.

My Pearls of Wisdom New Moon card is the Six of Cups. Love this card! I am being told that love offers happiness and funds good overall health. Memories are important to me, especially the cell memories that are satisfied by Vedic Thai-Yoga Bodywork. This waxing moon period will include a powerful focus on this concept and may bring a need to share this satisfaction with others.

My 6-digit date number is 11 (Archangel Uriel), which reduces to the number 2, distance and balance.

My horoscopes: “It's a terrific day for you, Sagittarius, one in which you'll find that your jovial approach to every situation is just what the doctor ordered. Spend time with children and enjoy their magical world. Spread your love and affection to the people around you. Make sure that the corners of people's mouths are turning up instead of down. A friendly attitude will take you far.”

And: “You're all about far off people and cultures, and if you're not on the road, your only consolation is getting in touch with something that reminds you of a distant place you adore. When it comes to long-distance communication (using email, phone or in-person visits), you can bet it's right on top of your list of favorite things. You are totally ready for branching out in a big way.”

And” “Whatever tasks you choose to focus on today are likely to be helped along by an increased level of logic and efficiency. In addition, insights into more ingenious methods of communicating and carrying out your ideas should enable you not only to get things done more quickly today, but streamline your efforts in the future. Don't be surprised if you have similar insights into the thoughts and feelings of those around you. Make the most of them!”

Wow, look at all those reversed Swords cards!

We had an awesome weekend. We had dinner at P & J’s on Friday night, and then got up early and headed down to Cape May. I actually got there by 10 am! It rained most of the day, so I vacuumed and got the inside of the house back in order after a series of weekend with guests, and then Helen and I got together and worked on our one hour sequence, both giving and receiving. Oh, it was wonderful to receive some bodywork!! And our “Lauren’s Sequence” is working out very well for us both. We ended up going to the Lobster House with Helen and her family for dinner, and we picked crabs and had a very enjoyable time.

Mystery and I did a very powerful ritual together. I am sooooo amazed at how connected we have become, Mystery and I. Each time that we do a working together, we are stronger and we depend on each other’s presence to a greater degree. Sunday dawned hot and sunny, and I got out my hedge clippers and weed whacker and spent a lovely day working in my garden. I had bookend Reiki Shares, the Sacred Mists Share at 10 am and the Pagan Brain Trust share at 10 pm. I did the morning Share out in my garden, and totally lost track of time! The evening Share was incredibly powerful; this time I felt that I was in a foundational supporting role, which I have never experienced before.

I also gave Maureen some bodywork. I am going to give Elizabeth some bodywork tonight, before our regular Pagan Brain Trust get-together, so that will be three days in a row of giving bodywork. I love it!!! I absolutely adore how I feel when having anything to do with this lovely and elegant modality.

Pagan Brain Trust tonight! Yahooo!!!

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Thursday, July 8, 2010

The Wheel/Justice. Interesting pair. The Wheel (Fire, hot/separates and dry/shapes; Jupiter, expansiveness and growth, justice, fortune; Kaph, grasping hand; and the Path between Netzach, the stimulating factors of emotion and inspiration, and Chesed (which crosses Da’ath), forms and structure are stabilized and nurtured) is a reminder that cycles happen, often without any interference by myself or those around me. What I need to do is make myself aware of the prevailing flows of energies, and move in the same direction. Justice (Air, hot/separates and wet/adapts; Libra, “we are,” partnerships cooperation, balance; and the Path between Tiphareth, the hub of the creation process where energies harmonize and focus to illuminate and clarify) reminds me that evenhandedness, balance and ethics are important today. Legal matters or matters connected to law might be of issue, and I need to remember that the best way to achieve balance and a fair outcome is to remain calm and be open to both sides of a situation. I need to practice informed decision making; I need to lay down the law, and they abide by it. Interesting to note that in the Welsh Tarot, the images on both of these cards center around a woman.

My Thoth card is the Two of Cups reversed. In an upright position, this card represents the love and cooperation and support that happens between two people, and because the card is reversed, this kind of love and cooperation and support may not be apparent. But the card is there, after all; my responsibility is to find a better way to tap into that good stuff.

My Legacy card is the King of Coins, flavored by the Ten of Cups. The King of Cups is about focusing on resource allocation and on tangible results. This king is good at directing and advising in matters of money, craftsmanship or construction; he is responsible for every physical manifestation, and he can sometimes represent a boss, or being in a position of authorityy. He tells me that I need to do things by the book, to assure that I have sufficient resources, and to be ethical and patient, and all will be serene and blissful.

My 6-digit date number is 7, the beginning of the degeneration of the vertical and horizontal balance of the 6.

My horoscopes: “When faced with ten entrees on the menu, it might be hard for you to choose just one. Feel free to order two or more, Sagittarius. Don't let indecisiveness slow you down. At the same time, don't view it as something negative. The key for today is to go with the flow. Expand your dreams as far and wide as you wish. Have fun as long as you're willing to take full responsibility for your actions.”

And: “Boredom is not on your schedule right now, thank heavens. Curiosity and competitiveness are taking up too much room to allow anything else! Take advantage of this buzzing energy to get lot of things moving. It's not the time for you to sit down and see things through from start to finish. Instead, you need to just begin projects you've been trying to get off the ground for some time now.”

And: “It's a great day to explore your creativity. This is probably not a new thing for you. Sagittarians are often artistic. Staying focused on one thing can be another story though. Today's energy can give you the extra concentration to go along with getting a creative project completed. With this, make the most of this by either finishing something from before or tackling a new one. Have fun by expressing yourself and in creating.”

It is hot, hot hot! My brain is a bit foggy due to the heat and humidity. I have a Tarot workshop tonight at Off the Beaten Path; hopefully I can remain awake for it!

Last night, I received a distance Reiki treatment for Aurora, as part of her Reiki Master Assessment. Not counting Reiki Shares, this is only the second time I have been on the receiving end of a Reiki treatment. I went to bed at about 11:30, which is usual for me. I slept like a stone, despite the uncomfortable heat and humidity we have been experiencing (103 on Tuesday, 100 yesterday, and LOL only in the 90's today), no dreams at all, and I did not wake up the first time until 5:30, which is pretty good for me. One thing I did notice is that I could actually feel the Reiki energy in my aura as soon as I woke, still dancing and tingling along the edge of the layer of aura, like static electricity.

I do a meditation every morning that includes an opening, cleaning and balancing of my chakras, and then an application of Reiki into each chakra before I relax them for the day. This morning, the Reiki turned on instantly and my hands warmed to my elbows! More of an indication that the Reiki you sent me is still in my aura. I can feel it even now as I type this journal post, somewhat ebbed but still there. Hopefully it will gradually be absorbed throughout the day by my physical body.

Some comments and responses from me. Anne said: I found some interesting blockages in the Solar plexus area, stomach, diaphragm and liver area, intestines too, so I cleared and focused there quite a bit. I am thinking physical because is seems the metabolic rate is slow. My response: I have been eating well, lots of fruits and vegetables, but cannot get things moving in my colon. I am not constipated, no painful issues, but things are indeed sluggish. Actually, I spent some time just yesterday reading about the colon on the internet, and some of the suggested cleanses of all extremes (but don't worry, I won't be taking any extreme steps), in the hope that I could tweak myself a bit more and get things running more smoothly. Fruits and veggies are all in season, so I am getting well above the 9 servings a day recommended, and I am also making the effort to drink more water. I forgot about Acidophilus, and I thank you for the reminder; I will buy some at lunch today.

Anne said: I spent time cleansing each of the Chakras, but have to say that your Heart, Third Eye and Crown are so brilliantly lit that I was stunned! You have a true gift and your abilities are unbelievably strong, your three chakras are so clear and full of light, spinning so freely, it was a glorious moment to share that with you and “feel” that energy so clearly! My response: I can feel this!! Every day when I work with my chakras, I can feel these three, warm and tingling, and sometimes their combined energy swells to such an extent that it leaks down into my heart chakra. I am sooooo glad that you were able to verify this for me, because even typing this has made the three of them open up. How cool is that?! I'm doing something right.

Still no word on what will be happening with my day job; I will talk to Josh again before leaving work today and hopefully get some kind of update.

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Tuesday, July 6, 2010

The Tower/Three of Pentacles. The Tower (Fire, hot/separates and dry/shapes; Mars, action, spontaneity, aggression; Phe, mouth or speech; the Path between Hod, the providing of analysis and communication; and Netzach, the stimulating factors of emotion and inspiration) is usually a card of warning; it tells of a potential change that will be all-encompassing, and it warns me that I need to make use of the energies associated with the change rather than fighting them. As I have learned over the past weeks, there is intense energy to be had in these chaotic situations, and if I work hard and remember what I have learned so far, I will surf the wave all the way to the beach rather than being knocked down and pounded into the sand. Those are the key words: “remember what you have learned and experienced already, and make use of what you have gained so far.”

My Thoth card is The Universe reversed. The synthesis that comes with this card can sometimes manifest itself through delay. Because my card is reversed, it may be very likely that delays will be presenting themselves. I need to remember that even delays offer useful energies so I should still persevere while keeping this card in mind; after all, I did not pull The Hanging Man, who surrenders to the effects of the day.

My Legacy card is The Star, flavored by the Nine of Swords. Hope tinged by worry is indicated today by the presence of The Star (Air, hot/separates and wet/adapts; Aquarius, “I know”; and Tsadi, fish hook, experience or thought; the Path between Yesod, patterns and images emerge that may manifest into Malkuth; and Netzach, the stimulating factors of emotion and inspiration) and the Nine of Swords. LOL, the worry appeared when I threw my first card! Interestingly enough, The Star immediately follows The Tower in the Major Arcana, and today they are bookends to my cards of the day, and in a preferable order. I may have a hard time avoiding worry, but the destruction of The Tower is balanced with the new hope of The Star.

My 6-digit date number is 5, the number of motion imposed on stability in order to prevent stagnation.

My horoscopes: “Today will be like playing a game on your home field, Sagittarius. You have fans out there supporting you and you know the territory. Take advantage of the little things that you have going for you. There is a dramatic force at work that may be erratic but extremely powerful as long as you can maintain control. Stay focused on your goals. True happiness is only a small step away!”

And: “When you set your mind to it, you're the best at analyzing situations and seeing the deeper meaning of things. Recent events may have the people around you in a tizzy, but you can take a shrewd, clear-eyed look at what is really going on. Not only do you know just what to do to make things better, but you're aware of exactly how much work it should take to get you where you want to go.”

And: “Today may be a good day for you to spend some time creating. While many Sagittarians are known for a love of sports, an innate artistic streak is commonplace. The joy of creating something is immeasurable and the process of getting to a finished product can be very enjoyable and therapeutic as well. Crafts, baking, cooking, and gardening are all activities conducive to this. Take time to express yourself through your favorite hobbies today.”

What a glorious weekend we had!! Friday night I left for Cape May at about 4 pm; got down in less than 3 hours!! That is a true miracle; normally the Friday night drive for a holiday weekend with awesome weather predicted can take 4 ½ hours or more. After a smooth trip, I sat down to a lovely dinner cooked by P & J; lobster stuffed with crabmeat, salad and fresh corn; yum!! Saturday morning we walked early, then went to the beach. We ate dinner out, at a local restaurant called Frescoes. Sunday morning, we got out early. We biked to Sunset Beach (about a 7 mile round trip) and then walked on the beach for a bit. After returning and eating lunch, we headed back to the ocean. S & G cooked ribeyes, corn salad, green salad and local corn for dinner, then we headed back to the beach, frosty cocktail in tow, for the Cape May Fireworks. Yesterday morning we went back to Sunset Beach, just in time to watch the tide change in a small stream (probably one outlet of Davey’s Lake in the Higbee Beach Wildlife Preserve). It was so cool to watch a shallow and still stream filled with huge clouds of minnows change into a deep stream flowing inward, filled with pulsing and dancing jellyfish, some with beautiful red markings and others with gracefully undulating streamers, filled with stinging cells (I can attest to this; a bit of pain but nothing worse, thankfully), all within a period of about an hour. We timed that one perfectly!

All the days were hot, but because the humidity stayed well below 40%, all of the nights were lovely. M & S, and M had a great time and were charming, and the dog was a pleasure, as always. LOL, the dog did not want to leave!!

The icing on the cake is that my drive up this morning was uneventful, and I had one of those lovely “reconnect” meditations that happen when I spend a few days really focusing on the physical world and physical world interactions. I was told that my efforts to raise personal energy through exercising my muscles and increasing my strength and flexibility are achieving wonderful results, and I was also told that true spiritual ecstasy can be attained by accessing my personal energy field through using the movement of strong, flexible muscles. Sacred movement indeed!

I did some bodywork this weekend, and set up more for next weekend. I am also going to contact Lisa and offer her a Reiki attunement. I’ve gotta keep the fire burning, as Helen is fond of saying!

My belly dance class resumes tonight, after a long hiatus of several weeks. I miss dancing, and I look forward to seeing my regular students. I also have another Tarot workshop on Thursday; last time I had two students and I am hoping that they will return. I will be emailing Elena my Reiki writeup, and scheduling that as well.

Back to reality!

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Friday, July 2, 2010

The Chariot/Judgement. The Chariot (Water, cold/binds and wet/adapts; Cancer, “I feel”; Cheth, fence; Path between Geburah, the challenging or affirming of form and structure, and Binah, female receptive energy and the origin of form and structure) brings drive and momentum into the day, and tells me that I will be able to be the master of my emotions. Judgement (Fire, hot/separates and dry/shapes; Pluto, power, change and rebirth, cycles of dying and becoming; Shin, fang; Path between Malkuth, the physical world of action and physical, outer reality, and Hod, analysis and communication), tells me that I will hear the wake-up call clearly, recognize today’s potential, and liberate myself. Pretty powerful card pair!

My Thoth card is the Queen of Disks. Resource management will come easy for me today, and I will remain calm, cool and collected no matter what.

My Legacy card is the Five of Coins, flavored by the Four of Wands reversed. Despite all the energy and potential of the day, the one thing I may not seem to find is physical world stability and foundation. I need to remind myself that happiness, serenity and overall health can happen without the presence of money or physical world pleasures; in fact, focusing on pleasing my physical senses could weigh me down enough so that I miss the other gifts of the other realms that are waiting for me. Turn around and look for them!

My 6-digit date number is 10, the number of completion of a cycle, which reduces to the number 1, position and potential.

My horoscopes: “Today might be a somewhat difficult day for you, Sagittarius. Instinctively, you'll want to escape the situation and explore your freedom, but something will be holding you back. Take care of the bills on your desk and deal with the mess in the bedroom. Clearing the physical space around you will help clear your mental space, too. You'll be footloose and fancy free soon enough.”

And: “Your emotions and your need to get things done are in perfect sync today, so there's not a moment to waste. Get busy doing whatever you want (or need) to do, and take your future exactly where you want it to go. You know where you want to be tomorrow, and thereafter, so what's the hold-up? Dig deep in your psyche, take time to see what's down there, and act on it.”

And: “Feelings of inferiority may be a real problem for you today. Ask yourself where this comes from. What could cause you to feel as though you aren't good enough or as good as someone else? Search your past for clues to the root of this attitude about yourself to see if you can nail down the source and rectify it. No one ever needs to feel inferior. These feelings are often only symptomatic.”

Boy, am I looking forward to a three day weekend. We have a house full of family, and it is going to be sunny and hot every day.

Happy Fourth of July!

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Thursday, July 1, 2010

Nine of Wands/Eight of Cups reversed. This Nine exemplifies Crowley’s “change is stability and stability needs change in order to be effective”; it tells me that there may be some challenges or difficulties to be dealt with today, but it also tells me that I will be well able to deal with them effectively, especially if I allow my Inner Voice to guide me. The Eight of Cups in a reversed position tells me that today is not a day to attempt to leave any outdated emotions behind; today I am well equipped to face them and end their influence over my life.

My Thoth card is the Princess of Swords reversed. In an upright position, this Queen is firm and aggressive; since she is reversed, I am told that for today I will be better able to access my wisdom, intellect and cleverness if I am not quite so firm and aggressive.

My Legacy card is the Two of Wands, flavored by the Seven of Cups reversed. The Two of Wands tells of the presence of both opportunity and the ability to influence outcomes. I am being told that today is a good day to focus on what I want and to use that desire to supplement and drive my Will. I need to make plans and set things in motion, but as I do this I need to keep my goal clearly in my mind. No running away today; face things square on, and get them accomplished!

My 6-digit date number is 9, the number of completeness of experience, and of the sense of having it all.

My horoscopes: “Today you might feel especially intellectually and creatively inspired, and you could discuss your ideas with others. The process of communication could open new doors in your mind and result in some fascinating insights concerning whatever you're pursuing at this time. Sometime in the course of your conversations, Sagittarius, don't be surprised if you find that one of your friends needs a sympathetic ear. Enjoy your day.”

And: “Family or not, your people have always struck you as being a bit on the loony side. Still, they're close, so you've been patient and working the smiles, nods and shrugs whenever you're questioned. Of course, there's a certain type of brilliance that goes along with that kind of eccentricity. Expect it to show up soon -- and for you to find yourself wondering if you may have been lucky enough to have inherited it.”

And: “A burst of physical energy might have you working far harder than you normally do. You'll accomplish a lot, and that should make you feel good about your day. However, you need to pace yourself and make sure you don't overdo. You could well burn out your energy reserves quickly and collapse in exhaustion at some point. Remember to take breaks, and don't forget to eat. That way you should get work done without doing damage to yourself.”

I am feeling a bit more grounded and settled today. I should know some time next week just how much work there will be at my day job, and will be able to go forward with some implementation of my other focuses based upon that information. I will be receiving my severance, and can go forward with that as well. So far, both of the “powers that be” have been open and above board with me, and while I am not relaxing my vigilance, I am feeling a bit better about things.

Last night I began watching some of Mukti’s DVD set, The Four Attitudes. I am so glad that we purchased this box set, for the asanas and other information within the DVD’s will add to my bodywork practice. I am excited about the 8 minute sequence that I watched last evening, which focused on a seated series, and I am looking forward to trying the series out this weekend. I am setting myself a personal goal to do some bodywork at least two of the three days that I will be in Cape May; after all, I have a house full of possible recipients!

A weight is gone from my shoulders, a weight that built slowly over the past two months, so slowly that I did not realize it was there. I am optimistic about the immediate future, and I look forward to implementing my plans. My affirmation of the day: I will become self-employed.

I submitted Lesson 1 of my Third Degree Training today. Yes, I am actually on Lesson 3, but because the new and formalized Third Degree Training Lessons are now online, I wanted to actually do the first two lessons even though I had already completed them. Now, I can move on to the essay in the Lesson 2 homework, and then be up to date in that training.

Progress!!

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