Three of Swords/Queen of Wands reversed.  **gulp** The Three of Swords (Saturn, discipline, responsibility, limitations and resistance, in Libra, “We are,” partnerships, balance, cooperation) usually indicates the possibility that logic, rationalizing and the intellect could end up causing harm if they are not used with balance and compassion.  I need to remember not to panic despite the fact that this is the one card of the entire Tarot that makes me nervous.  My own perception of a seemingly negative situation could be marred or inferior; it is important that I remember that reality may not be as bad as I think. The Queen of Wands (cusp of Pisces, “I believe,” feelings, duality, soul growth, spirituality, and Aries, “I want,” action oriented, assertive, competitive) in an upright position is energetic and enthusiastic, gives 100% of herself, and always has a smile on her face and humor in her heart.  My Queen is reversed today, so I might have some trouble accessing energy and enthusiasm, or possibly self-doubt could rear its ugly head. 

My Thoth card is The Empress reversed. The Empress (which corresponds with Earth (cold/binds and dry/shapes, and stable, material, practical energies that are slow to change), Venus (beauty, allure, pleasure, relationships), the Hebrew letter Daleth (door or womb) and the Path between Binah (female receptive energy and the origin of form and structure) and Chokmah on the Tree of Life (dynamic male energy and the origin of vital force and polarity)) is one half of the Major Arcana representation of the Sacred Feminine.  The Empress is about creativity, fertility of all kinds, a deep connection to Nature and the nurturing of others, and an enjoyment of the senses.  My Empress is reversed, and that means all these bounties could have a negative effect on me today.  No sense in getting drunk on Nature; perhaps a bit of discipline is in order.

My Legacy card is the King of Swords reversed, flavored by The Chariot. The King of Swords (cusp of Capricorn, “I build,” ambitious, cautious, cunning, authoritative, and Aquarius, “I know,” friendships, the group, cause-oriented, aloof) in an upright position represents a good judge of people and situations who is inspiring and courageous.  My King is reversed, and boy it sure seems like my ability to see clearly, inspire enthusiasm and believe in myself is impaired. The Chariot, which corresponds with Water (cold/binds and wet/adapts, and sensitive, emotional and imaginative energy that likes to stay the same or follow the same course), Cancer (“I feel,” sensitive, tenacious, nurturing, moody), Cheth (the fence), and the Path between Geburah (the place where forms and structure are challenged or affirmed) and Binah (female receptive energy and the origin of form and structure), tells of having the control necessary to focus on goals, and to avoid distractions.  This card is about avoiding temptations, and perhaps today the temptation I need to avoid is the temptation to bag everything and give up.  My Chariot is flavoring my reversed King of Swords today, and in a way, it is flavoring my entire reading.  I think what I need to remember here is that even if the end result is not good, I need to keep connected to my own Will; trying and failing is better than surrendering.

My 6-digit date number is 4, the number of depth and stability. 

My horoscopes: “Try to see the positive in people, Sagittarius. Relax and don't get so worked up over your internal drama. You're the one responsible for creating this turmoil. Find comfort in a creative project. Do something that you love to do that makes you truly happy. There's an expansive feeling in the air that's likely to amplify whatever mood you project.”

And: “Today is a good day for you to complete tasks. You will find that there is a great urge to bring things to completion. Do not keep things hanging any longer, and don't keep waiting around for other people to pick up the slack. It is important for you to initiate the final push on projects that have been sitting around collecting dust for quite some time now”

My Shadowscapes Insight is regarding the Two of Pentacles.  The message of this one is similar to the Major Arcana Temperance card.  The Two of Pentacles reminds me that sometimes in order to be in control of the big picture, we can’t be in complete control of every segment.  In order to juggle you’ve got to let go of the pieces you are juggling, and in doing so have confidence that we’ve tossed the pieces with skill, and that they will fall exactly where we expect them to fall.

I slept very deeply last night, and hardly woke up to cough at all, and that is good because I did not feel well all day yesterday.  I was afraid I was slipping into a relapse, but thankfully all is well. 

Boy, this must have been some case of bronchitis.  Even up to yesterday, any exertion caused me to be dizzy and light-headed, caused me to shake and tremble, and caused me to break out into a sweat.  I’ve been keeping busy, not laying around, but I’m moving slowly, resting often.  Up till yesterday, I was feeling as if progress was being made each day, but yesterday I just felt lousy.  Not tired enough to go back to bed, but definitely weak and foggy.  I listened to my body and went to bed very early last night; hopefully that will help.

I have been attending Yoga class each day, once again listening to my body and being gentle with myself.  The only time my brain feels clear is after one of those classes, so I am loathe to miss one.  Yesterday I also attempted to do a bit of stretching on my own; I did not feel up to much but it was a start.  Perhaps I will be able to add a bit more today. 

I do think it was quite interesting that during the height of the discomfort associated with this session of bronchitis I was able to perform one of the exercises from my Third Degree Lesson, the invocation of a specific Deity during a ritual, with ease.  In fact, during the time that I had a high fever, I was very much aware of my Patroness as She spoke to me.  I could feel Her presence, Her essence, very easily, and was drawn to perform that exercise/ritual despite being sick. 

Could intense discomfort be a stepping stone that assists us in raising our subtle awareness out of our physical senses by making the messages of those senses so uncomfortable that we tune them out or leave them behind? 

Hmmm . . .

In thinking about this, I was brought back to the Sephira called Yesod; here is a bit about this Sephira. Yesod (which means Foundation ) is the ninth Sephira on the Tree (right above Malkuth, Sephira number ten, which corresponds with the physical world), the third on the Pillar of Balance, and like the Moon, which is the heavenly body most easily reached from our Earth, it is the most easily reached non-physical Sephira of the Tree.  Yesod provides the life force that animates our physical selves, so in a sense, we are always experiencing Yesod.  Yesod contains the astral or etheric plane, and it is within Yesod that we build thoughtforms and intentions.  It is the sphere of illusion, and like the Moon, which appears to grow and shrink but actually stays the same size, Yesod is the whole of our visualizations of that which is not yet manifested in physical form.  Yesod is not only the last step before physical manifestation, but it is the first step after physical manifestation as well.  Our physical bodies are born and die within Malkuth, but our personalities are born and die within Yesod.  This sphere is the home of the Self, and of the Dark Night of the Soul.  Only after we dispel the illusion of failure and do the work to achieve forward motion once again will we truly understand the energies of Yesod.

The Moon of the Tarot Major Arcana corresponds with Water (cold/binds and wet/adapts, emotional and sensitive energy that strives to stay the same), Pisces (“I believe,” feeling, suffering, soul growth, duality), Qof (the back of the head), and the Path between Malkuth (the physical world of action and physical, outer reality) and Netzach (the stimulating factors of emotion and inspiration), is about feelings and emotions and instincts and the subconscious.

All of this is experiential in nature and very inner in manifestation.  And yes, we can deliberately access these effects through consciously choosing to turn off the messages of our physical senses and perceive instead the messages of our more subtle senses.  This often takes practice and training to achieve on a regular basis (although some are more easily able to attain this non-physical perception than others).  But it seems that, at least for me, experiencing certain physical discomforts combined with a high fever is enough to partially separate my subtle body perception from my physical senses.  After all, heat causes energy to intensify and raises the vibrational tone; perhaps the Sacred Essence is not only higher and purer in tone, but also warmer in temperature, and thus a fever can act as a natural invitation for that Essence to connect.

Not that I want to be sick, but that just might be cool!

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