Judgement/The Star reversed. Judgement corresponds with Fire (hot/separates and dry/shapes, and spontaneous, impulsive and energetic change), Pluto (power, metamorphosis, cycles of dying and becoming), Shin (fang), and the Path between Malkuth (the physical world of action and physical, outer reality) and Hod (provides analysis and communication), and represents the integration of my entire self by answering for my actions, and receiving and offering the appropriate response. This card really resonates for me today. The Star (Air, hot/separates and wet/adapts; Aquarius; Qof, back of head; the Path between Malkuth, the physical world of action and outer, physical reality, and Netzach, the stimulating factors of emotion and inspiration) represents love kindled by hope for humankind. It tells me that the act of giving itself is the greatest gift of all, and since the card is reversed, and paired with Judgement, I am being told that as I integrate myself, I need to remember with love and compassion every one and every thing that has played a part in my being who I am and where I am right now. I don’t get all the credit for this accomplishment, and I may be tempted to forget that fact today.

My Thoth card is the Queen of Cups. One of my favorite Thoth cards, the Queen of Cups (cusp of Gemini, “I think,” curious, sociable, dual, and Cancer, “I feel,” sensitive, tenacious, nurturing, moody) is Water of Water, and thus is quite deeply connected to her feelings and her Inner Voice. This Queen is the Minor Arcana equivalent of The High Priestess and the penultimate experience offered by the suit of Cups; she has learned to not only trust her intuition, but also to interpret its messages. Crowley sees her as somewhat dreamy and passive, but that is because her personality is formed by that which flows through her.

My Legacy card is the Knight of Wands, flavored by the Seven of Swords reversed. Knight of Wands (cusp of Scorpio, “I desire,” intense, controlling, deep, obsessive, and Sagittarius, “I seek,” philosophic, fun-loving, blundering) is a carefree inventor who loves to try new ideas; his power lies in his ability to use words and his intellect, and his ability to see outside the box. He is unpredictable, which can make him difficult to deal with, and indeed he is both encouraging me to be open to new experiences and warning me to keep a bit grounded. The Seven of Swords (Moon, feelings and emotions, illusion, imagination, in Aquarius, “I know,” friendships, cause-oriented, the group, aloofness) in an upright position tells of the effort to maintain things as we want them, usually through the use of deception and usually to the point of using unethical means. Crowley sees this card as weak; it tells us that cunning will work better than forcing the issue, but often when we use cunning, ethics become blurred. He also describes this card as bringing emotions into the picture, emotions which fuel a struggle that is futile because of the presence of those emotions, which cloud the intellect. Thankfully, it is reversed, but it is still there, flavoring my Knight of Wands; hopefully because I know there is a potential, no matter how remote, for all that Fire to become a negative influence, I will be able to prevent it from happening.

My 6-digit date number is 6, the number of vertical and horizontal balance.

My horoscopes: “Today you may need to contact a lot of people, Sagittarius, but the process could be frustrating. People may not be home, messages might not be delivered, or your equipment might not work properly. Unless it's urgent, it might be better to wait until tomorrow to try to reach them. You could end up too stressed otherwise.”

And: “Feeling tired? It's no wonder -- the pace (and the hours) you've been keeping lately are not conducive to staying alert and awake throughout the day. If you can't seem to get revved up to start your day, then sleep in a little bit longer. If you can't sleep in a bit longer, then promise yourself that you'll make time for a nice nap this weekend. They say you can't really catch up on sleep, but you need to get some more sleep in order to get back to feeling normal.”

And: “Enthusiasm and energy will be your allies today! Something different is floating in the air today and incites you to go forward. You will take decisions and new directions for the good of the people in your environment. Your dynamism will have a beneficial impact on your family. This newfound strength will give you a great boost!”

My Sun reading: “When rigid views stand in the way of listening, the keyword is "flexibility" to create understanding and make the best use of your problem-solving skills. Lighten up, flirt a bit, and enjoy life under tonight's Aries Moon. Bring a little fun and fantasy home.”

More than any other Path so far, it is as I study the 20th Path that I think of Stuart Wilde’s belief that the more you know and understand, the less you will be able to describe what you know and understand to others. How do you put into words the feeling of ability that comes with experiencing years of both successes and failures-that-turned-into-lessons? These experiences cannot be taught by another, for they are Mysteries and can only be discovered and learned and understood in solitary fashion. Yes, I am using the experiences of others as a map or guide, and those who come behind me on the Well Worn Path may very well use my experiences in the same way, but until I actually tap into the Mystery and until I actually meet an evolved entity or a learning experience face to face and until I actually step up to the threshold and not only present myself for the test, but pass the challenge through my own merits, I won’t understand the map or guide I am using.

It is as if I am retro-fitting the knowledge of others into what I have experienced myself, but that does not invalidate those experiences of others, for I would not have had the courage to strike out into the unknown unless I knew that others had succeeded already.

Actually, this places a burden upon me, this understanding. I need to pay forward the gift of guidance, as those who came before me have done so that I am able to receive the gift myself. Yes, I understood this with my mind, but once again, I am now understanding a concept with every cell of my physical body and every effect of my energy self. This is why the image on the Thoth Tarot Hermit (the Major that corresponds with this Path) has among its symbolism the sperm. To me, The Hermit and the debt of the 20th Path is not the same as The Hierophant (who is the Keeper of Tradition); The Hermit teaches by example, and his curriculum is created by taking the map of the experiences of others and then striking out on his own. This burden/gift is the Aha! Moment of being an Adept, and of the 20th Path!!

Now I know why it came to me without a prior test; the test comes after the realization of receipt of the gift. The next step is mine. And thanks to Sacred Mists and LM and the PBT, and all who blazed the Well Worn Path, I have already taken it.

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