Page of Swords reversed/The Sun. More Swords. *sigh* A day of rest, I am happy. I am being told that I will not need to be strong today or exhibit the fortitude to endure. A cycle has ended, and I will have a break before a new one begins, a break that will allow me to absorb the warmth and light that surrounds me as I bask in the glory of my accomplishments. LOL, I just have to remember that there are limits to how long I do this. Too much of anything, even of reveling in ones accomplishments, is not a good thing.

My Thoth card for today is also a Swords card, also reversed, the Two of Swords reversed. As I look back over the past week, I am amazed that almost every Thoth card I have drawn is of the suit of Swords! Today I am being told that I am not dealing with the pause or stalemate that is created by the balance of equal yet opposing thoughts. Crowley sees this card as also offering the possibility of some kind of deception, but since it is reversed today, I will see the light of The Sun as illuminating the hidden dangers and thus making them null.

Okay, I have it . . . Spring Fever. I want to wake up just before dawn to listen to that robin with the big mouth that insists on singing right outside my window, and then roll over and snuggle under the blanket until at the earliest, 10. Then I want to make myself comfortable, still in my jammies, with a good, trashy romance novel and a nice cocktail (yes, at 10 in the morning; you have a problem with that?!) and not move a muscle for at least two or three days. Oh, I just love this lazy feeling! It is positively sensual!! I love the way it feels to stretch my muscles long and hard with a groan, and then relax them completely, just like a cat who is awakening from a deep sleep. *heavy sigh*

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The Tower/Eight of Swords reversed. Oy. Okay, I am being given a warning that I may be approaching a time of releasing, of “cleaning house” so to speak, and I am being told that clinging to security may not be the best thing for me right now. What is best is for me to realize and remind myself that I do have the power to make it through any restriction, challenge, or bump in the road that appears in front of me.

My Thoth card of the day is Two of Disks, which represents change, luckily the kinds of change that bring harmony and stability in the end. The number 2 represents growth of some kind, and Crowley saw this card as showing the unending cycle between the heaviest element, Earth, and the lightest, Spirit, for to Crowley, Earth is the throne that Spirit rests upon.

Despite these very serious cards that I threw this morning, I am feeling rested and lighthearted. I will try to focus and be aware today, because I know how easily a lighthearted day can be changed, but I will also be tapping into this quiet joy throughout the day; hopefully I will be able to flavor every task with this serenity, and maybe spread it around to others in the process. Ah, Spring!!

We had a great weekend! We cooked and ate and walked on the beach, we took the kids to the arcade, and did all kinds of family bonding. But now, it’s back to reality. After two long weekends, I have some catching up to do. But I’m ready.

One of the three teachers in the Tarot Class that I teach is stepping down. That leaves me as the teacher with the most time facilitating the Class. I am really excited about this! Tarot is one of the main focuses in my life, and I never get tired of talking about the cards or learning about the cards. We have always treated each others as equals, we three teachers, and I think this will continue even after we bring on a new teacher to replace the one who is stepping down, but I am secretly proud to be the most senior teacher within this Class, even though this seniority does not bring any benefits or power.

Boy, did I find beach glass this weekend! Three separate walks on the beach yielded some really nice pieces. This coming weekend I think will be quiet *crosses fingers* except for the gardening that I want to get done. I should be able to find time to work with some of my glass, so that I can decide which gages of copper wire will work for me. I also picked up a lot more quartz this weekend, so hopefully we can get the rock tumbler going.

The three eaglets are so big that they don’t all fit anymore in the little cozy cavity of the nest so that mom can keep them all covered. LOL, she would not be able to keep even one of them covered any more. How quickly they grow!

The Fool/Eight of Swords reversed. I am being told that like yesterday, today is a day with important messages regarding new beginnings. I have learned much during my trip across the Abyss, and now is the time to start planting and nurturing those seeds so that they germinate. I have been given a blank page, and I need to fill it with the joyous and uninhibited fingerpaintings of a child!

My Thoth card for today is the Princess of Cups. This Princess exhibits all of the sweetness and rapture of her suit with the intensity and lack of ulterior motives of the young. She may appear selfish or lazy to others, but in reality she is focused inward and applying herself to doing her job, quietly and effortlessly. In the Thoth deck, the Princess card represents the element of Earth, and this element is seen as separate from Water, Fire and Air, but also as a necessary platform and catalyst that allow the other three elements to manifest. The Princess of Cups, therefore, is a loving and tender and sensual card, but its emotions are presented as a foundation or support or catalyst for others to expand.

I leave for Cape May tonight, and we will be having a houseful again. I can’t wait to get down there, because if I can find time between the raindrops, I will be digging into my garden. Yay!

I made my first sale last night of a larimar piece. Yahoo, Blue Moon Dancing is officially in business! I don’t expect to sell too much more until after my trip to the Dominican Republic in June, but I already have two requests that I will be fulfilling after that trip.

I will be ending each post from now on with a dollar sign, which will represent my little spell for progress in my creative endeavor. Not that money is my only focus, by any means! This dollar sign to me is a sigil that represents fulfillment and stability as well as prosperity.

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Four of Wands reversed/Ace of Cups. Today I am being shown the first step on the path to increased enlightenment and connection to love (and love’s ability to heal and fertilize). However, I am being told that just the planting of the seed of happiness is nowhere near enough. I need to fertilize that seed with passion and creativity and new ideas, and I need to get to work. Now is not the time to sit back and celebrate!

My Thoth Card is the Knight of Swords reversed. Another Knight; two days in a row, and they do present a supporting pair! This card in the upright position tells of someone who is filled with ideas, strong and passionate ideas which tumble over each other with intensity and instability. Rationality and intellect are presented here as omnipotent, shutting out practicality, groundedness and compassion. However, the card is reversed, which is a good thing. I am being told that I am able to prevent this “control through intellect” from controlling me, through the application of emotions and a connection to my foundations.

Interesting horoscope, too: “Working with another person today will be just as much fun as you were expecting it to be, but it could also create a critical turning point in your life. If you are ready for change, it is ready for you. You are all set to have a good time with creative brainstorming, and you will definitely not be disappointed. However, your tasks will not be all about play. There is some serious advancement going on in your life and the transition you're in is no laughing matter.”

I have been giving some thought to ghosts, probably because my husband’s niece (who sees ghosts) and her family will be coming to Cape May for the weekend. Maxim is 10 years old, and has been seeing the dead and astrally traveling since birth as far as we can tell; she has described these experiences since she became able to talk. Max has seen our Miss Pauline at Cape May, and she independently verifies everything that my dance partner has told me about Miss Pauline. Unfortunately, not all of Max’s experiences with ghosts are voluntary, and there are some spirits in her home (a late 1800’s house that was at one time used as a convalescent home, which could be source of the people dressed in white Max sees going up and down the stairs at night) that unnerve her. For instance, she sees a man sitting in front of the fireplace in the dining room every morning, and she wishes that he was not there.

I understand that many non-malevolent entities can be told to leave, but I think Max needs to be convinced that she can do this, that she can set boundaries with these spirits. I think she needs to know what these entities might be and why they are there (not their individual reasons, but rather how they could possibly come to be there) in order to believe that she can successfully ask them to leave her alone. I would like to be able to explain to her, in a way that she can understand and believe, exactly how I feel about ghosts. The best way for me to do this is to write everything down. So, here we go.

In order to understand my possible explanation of ghosts, I need to first say that while humans are certainly physical entities, they are also energetic entities. Our physical bodies and the physiological processes that maintain them consist of efficient processes that to a large extent repair themselves and fuel themselves in order to maintain life. However, we are also energy beings. Our brains communicate through the nervous system using energy as the message carrier, and our glands communicate through our blood and other bodily fluid, using hormones and acids and other chemicals as messages, using processes that are fueled by energy. We maintain our body heat, and fuel all those processes that allow the physical body to live, with energy created by our physical body from what we eat and drink. We can feel the first layer of that energy body, the etheric layer of the aura, with our physical skin by holding our hands against its surface.

Now, this energy can be collected and programmed to act or manifest in a certain way. In other words, we can learn to siphon off a little of this energy and use it for our own purposes, to help manifest our goals. Every time we pray or hope or focus on or visualize or fear that something will happen, we are actually collecting some of this energy and instructing it to strive to bring about what we are picturing in our minds. This picture that we are creating in our minds, this visualization of what we hope or fear will happen, is called a thoughtform. Thoughtforms, then, are energy that has been collected and given a set of instructions and then told to become what we are instructing them to be.

Some people are really good at creating thoughtforms, but just about everyone can learn how to consciously do this to some extent. Just like everyone could learn to play the piano with some skill if they are willing to work at it, but some people have a natural ability to learn without expending much effort, some people are able to make thoughtforms with ease but everyone can make them. Many people can make thoughtforms without realizing that they are affecting others with their moods and desires (whether they are angry or relaxed, happy or sad). Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that one person's thoughtforms can create a "Dawn of the Dead" scenario and turn us all into zombies, but thoughtforms can have tangible effects on us.

I believe that some people are able to gradually, over their lifetime, create an energetic copy or thoughtform of themselves at a certain imortant time in their lives or doing a certain thing that was pivotal in their lives. They are able to build and maintain and instruct this thoughtform to the extent that it is able to continue its existence independently for some time. And they are able to do this on a subconscious level, without even realizing that they are doing it.

This could be why some ghosts stay in a certain place or repeat a certain action again and again. For whatever reason, it is that place or that action that has been programmed into the thoughtform. Some ghosts seem to be able to respond to our words and actions in the physical realms; to me, the people who created these thoughtforms were able to infuse the energy with more details of their personalities, enough details so that the thoughtform is able to both act and react. Whether they realized they were doing this or not, these persons were talented enough (perhaps without realizing it) to create and fuel a very detailed and complicated construct.

So, what that means is that Max may not be able to chase them away, but she should be able to direct each of them to “do their thing” when she is not around. But she needs to believe that she can do this. Perhaps my explanation will make her fear them less and believe in her ability to affect what is happening more. After all, these thoughtforms are no longer attached to or being fed by a live person, and her energy is attached to and being fed by her live physical body. That alone, coupled with her belief in her own abilities, should tip the scale in her favor.

Now all I have to do is convince Max.

Ace of Cups reversed/Two of Cups reversed. Okay then, that is a clear message. Today will not be a “touchy-feely” kind of day, and any emotions that present themselves may be unsettling or uncomfortable, and they may seem to impact my relationships or connections with others. I am being told that I may have difficulty bringing love into the events of my day, and I am also being told that the relationships that may be impacted by this difficulty could be those dealing with some form of immaturity or inexperience.

My Thoth card for today is the Knight of Cups. Another Cups card! This Knight is seen as a messenger bringing calmness, serenity and messages from the source of inner wisdom. However, Crowley saw this card as being more sinister in nature. This Prince (Knight) is seen as being calm on the exterior, but this surface serenity hides hidden passions, the desire for power and wisdom, and ruthlessness. The Knight of Cups is seen as without conscience because of his ability to be ruthless while appearing calm and undisturbed by the actions he must take.

What a great weekend we had! The flight out on Friday morning was positively terrifying, but we got to Myrtle Beach safe and sound. Murrells Inlet is in full Spring, and the azaleas and wisteria and camellias and other flowers are breathtaking. The guys played golf as soon as we arrived, and the girls went to Huntington Beach State Park and toured Atalaya (the winter home of Archer and Anna Huntington, built right on the beach in the 1930’s). After we walked through Atalaya (which had the most beautiful inner courtyard lined with palm trees and with a Moroccan style tower in the middle of it, hence the name “Atalaya,” which is Moroccan for “tower”), we spent the rest of the afternoon walking on the beautiful beach in the state park. Dunes and an empty beach, with the sun shining and the sky a beautiful blue; what else can you ask for? I even put my toes into the ocean. Once we built up a nice appetite, we all went out to a great steak restaurant in Myrtle Beach for dinner. I was a carnivore this weekend, fer sher.

On Saturday, we hung out in the yard most of the day, sitting in the sun. We had a badminton tournament (LOL, visualize a bunch of 50 and 60 year olds playing; not a pretty sight!) and spent a lot of the time sitting and chatting, catching up on all of our lives. Then John, our hosts’ son, cooked a completely awesome meal for us (Colorado lamb; more meat!). We ended up breaking in the new fire pit after dinner, and finished the night sitting by a lovely fire after DeeDee and I spent about 30 minutes in the woods with flashlights looking for kindling. LOL, I went pretty deep into the woods, and all of a sudden, every crack of a twig had me gasping. What a baby I am sometimes.

Sunday the guys left early to play golf again. I got up pretty early, and sat outside on the back porch, watching and listening to the different birds calling back and forth, and watching the butterflies passing through the yard. To my delight, two coopers hawks came and sat in the trees, and called back and forth loudly to each other for about 5 minutes; what a great way to start the day!! The girls went back to BrookGreen and walked around the gardens for several hours. I was overjoyed to be back to Oak Alley and walking under those 250 year old live oaks. There is nothing I can compare to standing beneath these ancient behemoths; tree hugger that I am, I find that standing beneath them is a positively spiritual experience. Sunday night we went to the Dead Dog Saloon for dinner. Monday, we finally made it home after a 5 ½ hour delay due to weather; another nail-biting takeoff. And you wonder why I drink when I fly, no matter what time my flight is? Oy. But I guess the sheer terror nicely balances out the enjoyment of the rest of the weekend.

Back to reality! Oh, and the eagle chicks have primary feathers sprouting on their wings. The parents are confident enough in their strength to leave them alone in the nest. Yay!!

The Fool reversed/King of Wands. Today is not a day of creating new ideas; oh no! Today is a day of IMPLEMENTATION. And I say that out loud because that is the job of the King of Wands. He implements, and he does so in a fiery manner; he is, after all, Fire of Fire. In some ways, this King is an adrenalin junky because he loves the feelings that come along with the successful tackling of a problem.

I often see this card as a significator for one of my bosses, for he is one of those people that just loves conflict. I am going to anticipate that today, I will be the one at the end of the day that is feeling satisfaction because I was able to successfully bring to completion the tasks of the day. I will use tried and true methods for dealing with the potentially flammable energies of my boss, and I will not allow him to push the buttons that release my anger and irritation.

My Thoth card for today was The Moon reversed. Interesting! I see this card in an upright position as representing the things in our lives that are just unfamiliar enough to be unsettling; visions and dreams with messages presented through symbolism fall into the category of The Moon, and often we tend to fear what we don’t understand. I also see The Moon as being directly related to my current journey across the Abyss. The Moon is connected to the Hebrew letter “Qoph” which means “the back of the head.” Perfect description for me, because that is the part of my brain that has been specifically chosen for me for this current set of meditations. Crowley saw this card as being related to The High Priestess (the waxing moon), but as the other side of the coin, so to speak, the waning energies. I think of how the moon looks to me during its waning stage if I happen to be up in the “wee hours” of the day, with the lit crescent pointing towards the sun in the east because the sun is behind the moon, rather than at the sun in the west, which is how we usually see the crescent moon (unless we are up late). Familiar, yet unfamiliar, the same as the energies of this card.

Yet, my card was reversed, which seems to hint that I am reaching the end of my journey across the Abyss, and also the reversal seems to be telling me that I should not fear the things that seem just a little different than I remember them. Uncle Al sums this up best: “Whatever horrors may afflict the soul, whatever abominations may excite the loathing of the heart, whatever terrors may assail the mind, the answer is the same at every stage: ‘How splendid is the Adventure!’”

Queen of Cups/Two of Cups reversed. Today will be a day of intuition and the subconscious, and I will find myself focusing on fantasies and visualizing the goals that have yet to be. But I do need to be aware that I should use my head as well as my heart today, for my distractions have the potential to cause complications in my relationships to others. Balance is the key.

I have started something new today: I pulled one Thoth card to supplement my usual two-card draw. I won’t necessarily be doing this every single day, but as often as I have the time to do it, I will pull one extra card. My Thoth card for today is the Seven of Disks reversed. Whew! Glad that one is reversed, for in the upright position, Crowley’s Seven of Disks tells of lots of effort with little reward. That should not be the case today; however because the card appeared at all, even though it is reversed, there is a warning for me, a sort of “what could be if I don’t keep trying” situation.

I somehow broke my Turkish evil eye protection amulet the other day, and then knocked off a hubcap while parking my car (I retrieved the hubcap), and then had my rear view mirror broken by someone driving by. Oy. I made sure that I bought a new one at my dance class last night. My poor car!!

We leave early Friday morning for Myrtle Beach; should be a fabulous weekend. There are three other couples flying down with us; that makes five couples. I expect that I will not be sticking to my diet, but hey . . . I don’t get to be together with the entire group that often.

The three eaglets at the Virginia Botanical Gardens website are doing just fine. I check out the webcam whenever I have a moment, and I often catch Mom or Dad feeding the kids. They are so cute! The chicks are still in that “downy fuzz, swaying back and forth” stage; soon they will be sprouting feathers. The sweetest part of the feeding happens when both of the parents are at the nest, as they were this morning when I checked on the family. The male will help to feed the chicks, but he will also spend some time feeding Mom. Apparently, this is part of the pair bonding for eagles, and this pair has been together for several years now. Here is a link to the webcam: http://www.wvec.com/cams/eagle.html

More exciting news: a friend of mine is writing a children’s book, and she has asked me to do the illustration for the cover. I am really excited about this! I sent her a few sketches, and she loved them. Another creative outlet! And believe me, typing this here is a courageous act on my part; it makes this commitment real.