Page of Pentacles reversed/Justice. The Page of Pentacles (Aries, “I want,” assertive, action oriented, Taurus, “I have,” sensual, cautious, stubborn, and Gemini, “I think,” curious, sociable, dual) in an upright position is down-to-earth and responsible, and a listener and a learner.  My Page is reversed, and perhaps there is a reason for this.  I’ve accomplished many things over the past few days, and just for today, I have been thinking more about what is already done, rather than thinking about the possibilities and potential that are available to me in the physical world.  I guess we all need to pause every so often and assess just where we are; constant expansion with no grounding is not good.  Justice is a card of adjustment, and it corresponds with the element of Air (hot/separates and wet/adapts, and quick, animated energy that usually brings problems or challenges that bring growth), Libra (“we are,” partnerships, balance, cooperation), Lamed (ox goad; training or teaching), and the Path between Tiphareth (the hub of the creation process where energies harmonize and focus to illuminate and clarify) and Geburah (the place where forms and structures are challenged or affirmed).  This card validates my reversed Page of Pentacles, because it focuses on cause and effect.  This is also a card of karma, and of being accountable for our decisions and actions.  Today is not about accessing new possibilities, but rather it is about dealing with what has brought me to this moment.

My Thoth card is Two of Swords reversed.  “Peace” is Crowley’s keyword for the Two of Swords (Moon, feelings and emotions, illusion, imagination, in Libra, “We are,” partnerships, balance, cooperation), which in an upright position can represent a time of not looking or of shutting out the world.  My card is reversed, because my time of shutting out the world is coming to an end.  The silence that this card represents is, after all, achieved by cutting all contact with the outside world.  We can’t stay there forever, it’s just not healthy.

My Legacy card is the Queen of Swords reversed, flavored by the Nine of Coins reversed.  More reversed cards! The Queen of Swords (cusp of Virgo, “I serve,” practical, sensible, work and service oriented, and Libra, “We are,” partnerships, balance, cooperation, grace) can be considered a Minor Arcana representation of the Justice card, and that card is in my spread today.  But my Queen is reversed, so how does that connect with my upright Justice card?  Hmmm . .  She is being flavored by another reversed card, the Nine of Coins. The Nine of Coins (Venus, beauty, allure, relationships, in Virgo, “I serve,” practical, analytical, work and service oriented) in an upright position tells of accomplishment through the imposition of discipline.  I think there is a warning to be found within these two cards.  The reversed Queen could very well be warning me that perhaps my judgment imposed on a situation may not be as sound as I believe it to be.  That reversed Nine of Coins could be offering a solution here: don’t look in the box, look out of the box.  The solution to the dilemma is not going to be found within tried-and-true rules.  Okay, this makes sense, particularly because the Judgment card above is the only upright card of the day.  Okay then, I will reserve judgment and I will allow myself to be a bit undisciplined as I search for resolution.

My 6-digit date number is 7, the number that tells of the pause that comes as growth slows and degeneration approaches, usually involving some kind of choice.

My horoscopes: “A trip through exclusive boutiques or antique shops might have you throwing financial caution to the wind and buying luxury items you hadn't planned for. This is all right - up to a point. Take care not to buy more than you can use. Don't go to the opposite extreme and be too miserly either. You've worked hard and deserve a treat or two.”

And: “You may not be sailing off into the sunset today, but at least you can start planning for it. Your emotions are taking on a somewhat reserved approach today and you might feel as if someone has suddenly put a damper on your fun. Take this as a sign to reorganize and plan. Sometimes it is important to restrict ourselves in order to learn the lessons of discipline and patience.”

My Shadowscapes Insight is regarding the Two of Cups.  Oh, I am happy to see this one.  All of my other cards have told of discomfort, but this one tells me that love is the answer, love is always the answer.  As long as I do my best to be ethical, love will heal me and support me and nourish me.  Loving someone is awesome; having them love me back is beyond awesome.  Makes everything else bearable.

I spent last night with my beloved Wayne Contingency of the Pagan Brain Trust.  We always have incredible evenings, but this one was particularly memorable.  I performed a Dark Moon Esbat (one of the required exercises of the current Third Degree Lesson on which I am working), complete with all my usual and customary tools and words, and I will admit that I was a bit nervous.   Oh, I have plenty of confidence in the effectiveness of my personal rituals, and I have performed them enough so that my words are actually symbols representing potent energies.  But the PBT is not a coven.  We don’t all work with the same Deities or entities or world views (the most “present” Deities in this particular household are Brighid (to whom Tara is dedicated) and Loki (to whom Bug is dedicated)).  We all mesh well, but each of us is confident and well-versed in our individual disciplines.  And I was a bit afraid that this ritual might end up being the energy equivalent of herding cats. 

Not so.

As soon as I began creating my Sacred Space, I felt calm descend upon me.  The familiar words and the sensations of connecting to familiar energies calmed me.  I called the Watchers and my personal Elemental Guides, and they were there instantly, without any coaxing needed on my part.  They played their individual roles with a solemn formality that surprised and gratified me; their deference to me as ritual leader validated that leadership.

I chose to invoke Dark Goddess and Dark God rather than my specific Deities, in deference to those Deities associated with this household, and also because I was hoping that those household Deities would attend, along with my own Deities.  And They did.  In fact, Loki, that Trickster, was very effective at lightening the atmosphere by making us laugh.  Small “bumps” and “tangles” happened (at one point a match was blown out; seriously, we all heard the puff of air that extinguished the flame!), and we all smiled at each other with shared amusement. 

In the end, this turned out to be a valuable experience for me.  Leading a ritual attended by confident, like-minded people who are not of my coven or community is a bit different from leading rituals within my coven and community.  This ritual was powerful in a different way from any other ritual I have led.  Afterwards, everyone provided their thoughts after I reminded them that this was a lesson exercise.  In the end, they had no criticism, at least none that they mentioned to me (whew!).  Each of them seemed to find something in the ritual that was a catalyst for further thought.  **smile** I am good with that.

We had an awesome meal, shared some chocolate cake, and then I gave Tara some Thai Bodywork.  We finished the night with a mug of tea, sitting around The Table and digesting the events of the evening. 

$>